What about Modesty?

"If you look at a woman with lust, you have already committed adultery with her in the eyes of God." —Jesus

I recently wrote about the lust of the flesh in this blog. Since that time, I have felt God tugging at my own heart about the role women play (or more specifically I play) in keeping men from falling into the sin of "gawking". I can be a bit of an attention-seeker at times. It really isn't an intentional and thought out plan. Nevertheless, I do realize I do this sometimes. We could psycho-analyze me to death and determine that I probably didn't receive enough attention as a child. Perhaps its just my sinful nature alive and well. Whatever the root cause, I will confess that I do feel validated somehow when I'm able to turn a head or two.

I know God does not want my focus to be on how many studly men I can get to do a double-take. Colossians 3:12 says, “Since God chose you to be the holy people whom he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.”

He wants me to choose clothing that honor Him.

I TIMOTHY 2:8-10: “I desire therefore that the men pray everywhere, lifting up holy hands, without wrath and doubting; in like manner also, that the women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with propriety and moderation, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or costly clothing, but which is proper for women professing godliness with good works,”

As I prayed and searched scripture on this topic, I realized that when we dress in a way to gain that kind of attention we do it because we are selfish. Check out Phil 2:3: “Don't be selfish; don't live to make a good impression on others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourself.”

I pray that no one reading this would fall into legalism. It seems that this topic can get us in a yoke of bondage really fast. There are some people that think women should never wear pants, some that think after a certain age women shouldn't wear shorts, while yet another believes tattoos are wrong. We could go back and forth all day and never completely agree. I think the bottom line, in my opinion, is that God judges your heart in all things. You will dress outwardly based on what is inside your heart. (This is true in regards to the amount of grace you extend others as well.) If you claim to be a Christian, you should want to represent our creator in a way that isn't sexually enticing to others. You must be willing to die to yourself.

I SAMUEL 16:7: “For the Lord does not see as man sees; for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.

I think the three most powerful influences we have in reaching others are the way we speak, the way we treat others, and the way we dress because these things influence not only how we are perceived, but how our God is perceived. What is the message that you convey by your speech, actions, and dress? Does your speech, actions, and dress share the good news that God has redeemed your life?

PROVERBS 11:22: “As a ring of gold in a swine’s snout, so is a lovely woman who lacks discretion.” Why would you want to entice a man to look at parts of your body (even if they are tightly covered) that should only be seen by your spouse? This isn't a rhetorical question, by-the-way. If you find yourself struggling in this area, ask God to show you your motive. If you find yourself judging other women caught in this struggle, perhaps you have a struggle with insecurity or jealousy or even self-righteousness. God sees your heart as well.

ROMANS 12:2: “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.”I JOHN 2:16-17: “For all that is in the world -- the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life -- is not of the Father but of the world. And the world is passing away, and the lust of it; but he who does the will of God abides forever.”

If you feel unsure about what is an appropriate manner to dress ask yourself the following questions:

1. Am I showing that I love God by my appearance?
2. Am I honoring God by the way I am choosing to dress?
3. Am I protecting my brothers (all men) from committing the sin of the lust of the flesh by the way I dress? Don't be tempted to say that men will lust no matter how you dress. This is true in some circumstances. However, in many other circumstances, women place the thought in the heart and head of man by the way we dress. Can you imagine how many other thoughts we can plant by our holy life?

For more information about dressing modestly, go to:

http://www.modestyrocks.com/

or,
The Look: Does God Really Care What I Wear? (Paperback)by Nancy Leigh DeMoss (Author) "As we begin our search for "The Look," take a minute and jot down what comes to your mind when you hear the word "modesty..." (more)

God is able to deliver the self-righteous one from his condemnation and judgements against others. God is able to deliver the immodest woman from her immodest way of dressing. God is able to teach both of us to extend grace and mercy to the other.